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Monday, August 15, 2005

anonalogue promoting mumbo-jumboism

daveberta calls on right-wing blogger to come clean on his secret agenda of non-sex marriage

For Immediate Release
August 15, 2005

EDMONTON- Following today's shocking accusations from right-wing blogger and Anne Cools-a-holic, Anonalogue, daveberta is calling on the Blogging Tory member to come clean on his secret agenda.

In an email dated Monday, August 15, 2005, Mr. Anonalogue denounced the wonderful chris-face original Southparkization of daveberta's Editor-in-Chief. In his email, Mr. Anonalogue cried that he was "shocked and outraged" and that "the word 'Liberal' does not belong in the same .jpeg as an assault rifle."

Anonalogue continued his rant with bold statements that "[t]here is no such thing as a South Park Liberal..." only "…South Park Conservatives," and that "[y]ou can be a Liberal. Or you can be a South Park fan. But you cannot be a Liberal and a South Park fan."

Earlier today, Mr. Anonalogue continued to pontificate his cartoon-induced rage in the comment section of the great blog known as daveberta by "DEMAND[ing]" that the editors of daveberta remove the "viciously heteronomative… picture from his website and replace it with a… less heterosexual image more befitting of a gun registry and gay marriage supporter, like this."

Daveberta's Editor-in-Chief responded, “Mr. Anonalogue’s attack on chris-face's masterpiece is an attack on all artists and freedom lovers. We are incredibly proud of the work which Mr. face has done and feel privileged to have graced his artistic vision. This right-wing blogger is clearly on a mission to spread the dark ideas of mumbo-jumboism. One day he professes his love for libertarianism and Anne Cools, and then denounces freedom of the arts in the next."

The Editor-in-Chief continued "it is quite clear that Mr. Anonalogue's statements regarding the ‘vicious heteronomative’ images in the masterpiece are signs of his secret agenda of implementing non-sex marriage in Canada."

In response to this shocking revelation, Daveberta’s Editorial Board unanimously endorsed the following statement: "Conservative ducks such as Mr. Anonalogue have lost their battle against same-sex marriage and now they want to ruin it for everyone by imposing non-sex marriage. Not only is the principle of non-sex marriage clearly opposed by a majority of the human race, it's just not cool. We will fight against Anonalogist non-sex marriage to the bitter end. It's just not natural."

For More Information Contact:
daveberta media centre


AWGB said...

let the games begin.

Anonymous said...

Let's ban marriage, if nobody gets married anymore tories can't push their no-sex marriage and we can have sex in peace :) Ananologue seems pretty sexually frustrated so it would be good for him.

Mike said...

No-sex marriage is kinda redundant, don't you think?

And I'm and NDP South Park fan. Explain that one.

Zorpheous said...

Is Anal-Log getting all righteous and preachy again? Hey Dave, who knows, he might even call you Asian, anti-white, racist. He's still banned over at Section 15 for calling Mark a liar. The guy isn't worth the bow shot. But if you are going to make fun of him, toss him a few bananas from me for him, would-jaya?

The Big Z.

CFAC Library said...

This whole situation is totally insensitive to the plight of hermaphrodites everywhere.

Does Mr. Logue propose the marriage of only the gender neutral? Shall we now drag grammarians into this unwieldy debate?!?!

c-lo said...

Most Brillant Daveberta post ever!

Noel M said...

Well, if a sexless marriage is good enough for Harper and McKay, it's good enough for An Anal Log...

Anonymous said...

Non-sex marriage sounds like one I would end up in.

John Murney said...

Non-sex marriage sounds like the type of marriage I would end up in.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Emilio said...

He doesn't say he wants no-sex marriage. You guys are just making this shit up to try to be funny which you aren't. I find his post funny cause he's making you Liberals out to be totally gay with his cartoon. It's a funny stereotype. It's just his idea of humor and I see no problem with it. Maybe you guys are taking it too seriously and got offended too easily.

CFAC Library said...

Your logic, Mr. Eel, is infalliable, as per usual. Daveberta is obviously "taking it too seriously" and "getting offended." Our evidence is clearly in his satiric response to Mr. Logue. Only the wrath of Daveberta could spawn a post on the dreadfully serious topic of non-sex marriage.

J'accuse, mon petit fromage!

daveberta said...

emil said: "He doesn't say he wants no-sex marriage. You guys are just making this shit up to try to be funny which you aren't."

Yes we are and we are. A little slow on the ball this mornin' Mr. Emil?

Holtopia said: "Our evidence is clearly in his satiric response to Mr. Logue. Only the wrath of Daveberta could spawn a post on the dreadfully serious topic of non-sex marriage."

Indeed, my good friend.